THROWBACK: The Brain in your 20's….How it really works

I wrote this when I was 22. I'm turning 30 this year (yikes), I think it still applies. I really want to edit this, but there's something sweet about authenticity. Growth matters, so here's where I was 8 years ago.

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I recently read an article posted by the Huffington Post and the premise of the article was to outline what goes through the 23 year old brain. Mainly the identity crisis, lack of direction, and bleak worldview. As a 22 year old, I felt that a response was warranted because I refuse to become that type of 23 year old.

I feel great in my grown-up clothes, even when I’m sitting in a chair at a job that I know is only temporary. I walk down the street with my head held high, of course momentarily looking down on my screen to see the latest like on a photo I shared; but have no interest in someone else validating a decision I have made for my life other than God. I work hard because even though I’m not sure if that job I where I want to be, laziness is not an option. And I’m not scared to be alone, so dating people I’m not sure of or just want to keep around for company doesn’t happen.

I spend hours researching and conversing about things that make me happy and cultivate the dreams I have set for myself, the occasional glass of wine doesn’t hurt. Most of my conversations with my friends don’t center around me telling them they are going to be ok, our conversations are made of plans for starting new businesses, promo vids, marketing plans, the future, and actually doing something about it. I’m hard on my friends because I believe in them, and I’m even harder on myself because I believe in myself.

It is true that we dance all night, love who we want, hate labels, and are too old to crash college parties. No one lives on the same block anymore, but I still stay up till 1 am running back and forth. The hustle doesn’t sleep. I have a lot of obligations and I am always stressed wondering if life will be more certain. But I serve a great God who has promised me that he will give me the desires of my heart and has plans for me that I can’t even fathom.

The reason why breakups never end is due to the fact our lives revolve around social media, which constantly reminds us of our exes, and we resort to online dating or swiping on Tinder instead of being face to face with actual human beings.

We are 23 or in our twenties period. These roles we think we have to fill, and the constant search for what's next, really lie in the fact that we have become utterly too focused on the path the outside world has deemed “right’ instead of focusing on where we actually want to be. College will not be your salvation, getting married and having kids will not make everything right, a 401K is not going to make you feel fulfilled, and beating yourself up because you're not exactly like Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates will not help with you feel confident in your own talents. Breakaway from the norm, and wake up to the fact that we are not all meant to travel the same road! You don’t have to sit in grad school taking courses you're not interested in. You don’t have to take the corporate job because its safe, and you don’t have to go teach English in Rwanda to make yourself feel better about yourself. But if that's what you want to do, then do it. Don’t focus on the “what I should do’s”- be an individual for once. Maybe when you deliberately seek God’s will for your life, no matter how out of the ordinary it may be, you will finally feel at peace.

So to all the 23 year olds, actually anyone in their 20’s and beyond. It really is time to enjoy your youth. Worry and complaints come with the territory. But stop for a moment and realize you have your health, family, and friends. Even if you don’t have any of those things, you have the mind God gave you and are alive another day. Go out and party, work hard, relish in the fact that some of you don’t have families to take care of yet and stop trying to live a life outlined by others. Trust me, it’s much easier that way.

But then again, I have one more year before my brain is on 23.

UPDATE: Now that I'm 30, I can say - facts. My goal in life is to work my ass off to get what I want and pursue enjoyment at all costs.